Christmas count down
My darling daughter took part in her divine nativity play last week - yes last week, in November... Christmas is indeed arriving earlier and earlier each year. The tiny munchkin gave an outstanding performance, indeed I have been weeping ever since...
Brenda (my mother) attended Freya's production as James was in South Africa. My devout Roman Catholic mother likes to analyze the plot lines of the nativity plays at the munchkins' Church of England schools in order to ensure that my perfect poppets are not poisoned by "damned protestant lies." She really is an outrageous bigot terribly protective you know.
Freya's role was;
"The very most important part in the whole play," she claimed.
"Are you the baby Jesus my tiny angel?" I enthused...No response. "The blessed Virgin Mary?" I sang inquisitively...No answer. "An Angel?" Freya eventually replied; "No silly mummy, I am a Page of course, the one who carries the gifts for the wise men. What would Christmas be without presents?"
My darling tiny flower is every piece of her mother...
Freya came directly to us in the audience from the stage when the curtain went down and announced "Santa must be coming tonight then"!
OHMYGOD!!!
"But there are four full weeks until Christmas my angel," I replied (frozen to the spot with shock).
"I want my Butterscotch pony now" she howled. Brenda was horrified.
I blame the schools, my mother agrees. How dare they hold their wretched productions so early. I shall be tortured from now until the big day.
9 comments:
Dear darling Freya.....can she come and teach Mac the words to Away in a Manger? I am losing the will to live (and am beginning to hate the song) He has less than two weeks and "gets bored" after the first verse.....and I so want him to upstage Sheep Two and Three.
Perfect Nunhead Mum Of One,
I have found that a recording of the appropriate song, downloaded from the internet and then transferred onto a childs Ipod device (via perfect PA Lydia - I am a complete technophobe) - you can buy such an Ipod thingy in the Early Learning Centre - and then just pop the ear phones onto the child when he is asleep! It works like magic to (brainwash) help your darling to learn!
And in our house we have double confusion on the whole present thing since Husband is Dutch and we have to celebrate the whole St Nicholas thing as well... We have two very confused munchkins here.
Father Christmas / Sinta Klass lives in frozen Spain, rides a white horse tethered to some reindeer, and gives children delicious treats in their shoes but if they are nasty they get coal in their socks. I am expecting social services to knock on the door any day now and give us a good talking to about messing with their minds.
Darling Potty Mummy,
How terribly confusing for you! But does this in fact mean that you get to celebrate Christmas twice ... with gifts on each occasion? (Hurrah???)
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.... You clearly haven't heard that in mainland Europe the Dutch have the same reputation for being 'careful' with their money as the Scots do in the UK.
So, that'll be 'no' then.
As the giver of most of the gifts, and the provider of all the food and comfort on the big day, does that make me the most important person in my particular play? Could someone please point this out to my offspring?
I'm with Freya - the presents are the most important part - and it's good if they sparkle...
Brenda attends their plays?
I once rang 'Shirl' on a sunny frosty morning.
"It's fantastic weather here today, Mum, drive over, you'll get here just in time to see the girls in the school play this afternoon"
I went to the play, my mother was absent. She turned up a couple of hours later saying how lovely the play was...she'd gone to the wrong one! (And hadn't noticed the absence of her grandchildren!!)
Oh darling Potty Mummy,
I am sure that the Dutch are terribly cosmopolitan, didn't they invent Birkinstocks? OHMYGOD - those shoes are so damned utilitarian, God help you!
Please Marianne,
Email me the contact details of your offspring, I shall get my PA Lydia straigh onto it!
Sweet Frog,
I love Shirl, even her name is more cosmopolitan than Brenda's!
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