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Monday, 21 April 2008

Worried Parent

My perfect six year old boy was recently given a new game for his Nintendo DS player by my mother Brenda. I was aware that darling Max had wanted an action game cartridge for the contraption, but I preferred for him to occupy himself playing with his Brain Training exercises or with his Lego or even reading or cycling his bicycle (sniff).

Since receiving this new accessory, I have observed sweet Max behave like Golum from The Lord of the Rings each time it is suggested that he turn the game off/share with his friend/do his homework or eat his supper. OHMYGOD!!! It has been the most traumatic experience for the rest of the family (sigh).

I am not happy at all with the influence that computer technology; games, Email, MSN Messenger, Texting, You Tube networking sites like Facebook and Bebo, appear to be having on the social development of our progeny.

Children are no longer expected to use their imaginations whilst playing, if they are attacked they instantly retaliate. These tiny munchkins are not being encouraged to moderate their responses to situations or people with whom they may have a disagreement. There are no consequences for their aggressive behaviour and they can immediately observe the vivid computer generated evidence of their destructive actions on others (dabs eyes). There are never any points awarded by these vile computer games for diplomacy.

The poppets are so very Innocent and easily led (sniff).

It is now possible to conduct relationships on-line without the need for physical contact, the ability or opportunity to interpret non verbal communication is lost. Where is the art conversation and debate? Where is the charm? I am so very depressed by the destructive influence of computer technology on modern life (buries face in enormous white cotton handkerchief)...

I am off to surf around the SheerLuxesearch engine to cheer myself up for an hour or two. I will eliminate my despair by making a couple of designer purchases online. I always find spending cash on these super sites strangely easy and quite therapeutic. I adore self-gifting (blows nose loudly)!

It never seems like real money that I am spending, I find it frightfully difficult to restrain myself. It is so very easy to get carried away but hey ho, where is the harm in a little retail therapy? It is not as though we are bordering on a recession...

Can I offer you a hot whiskey (gulp)?

The rain may pelt from the heavens, but it doesn't matter a jot that I am suffering from a heavy cold as I sit here shopping on-line!


zoe said...

Darling, this is the way forward. My children rely on a computer for some of their homework - mainly history - in fact, their teachers expect each household to own a computer.

Think of it as a good thing - and I'll never have to talk to you again, either.

[mental note]: must get rid of Skype.

Expatmum said...

Ah, had I known this purchase was imminent, I would have suggested that it is a weekend toy only. My son has had a PS2 for about three years now and he's still only allowed to do it at the weekend. Makes for great blackmail, I mean motivation too.

Potty Mummy said...

Re: the label on this post, DM; is that because you have the skin of a 14 year old girl?

(Totally with you on the computer stuff, by the way - and will be taking Expat Mum's advice above when the time comes...)

Frog in the Field said...

My dear DM, don't sniff so!
Have some Sloe Gin, it'll get rid of your cold and help you drift off to sleepybo's.
I like your label too, very funny.
But, you knoe the scary thing? (apart from my shocking spelling)Brenda could be here already....who knows?

aims said...

Dearest DM - You know your darling poppets will learn sociability and decorum from their excellent mother - how could they not?

At least you aren't saying they are toting around play machine guns and threatening the dog.

Don't worry too much - I think they'll get the hang of drinking tea with a pinky in the air and blowing the cigar smoke out in perfect rings...

dulwichmum said...

Darling Zoe,

Don't you want to talk to me anymore? I am sitting here wearing my special ear accessories and everything (sniff)! I would miss my cyber chum so very much...

Perfect Expatmum,

I have tossed the damn violent game in the wheelie bin! I have kept the Brain Training - naturally!

Sweet Potty Mummy,

I do look simply amazing for my age you know!

Oh Aims dear heart,

you say the nicest things. Can I offer you a G&T? It is after six afterall...

Pig in the Kitchen said...

have you ever tried the brain training game thingy? i think i had a go on that at the weekend (cutting edge, finger on the pulse, that's me)...and my brain weighed a disappointing 950 grams. If only my derriere weighed the same. pig sniffs, and clicks on the sheerlux link...

Vanessa said...

You've been tagged! Rules (and flattering comment) on my blog.

KalamityKel said...

DM! *waves*
Wot on earth are you worrying about... more time for self pampering and choccy! Let the boy b ;-)

dulwichmum said...

Darling Pig in the kitchen,

My brain age is 92! I am beside myself with disgust, my bladder is not nearly as young as it should be either - sin't child birth a catastrophic indignity?

Sweet Vanessa,

Many thanks dear heart.

Lovely Kalam,


beta mum said...

I got my brain age down from 88 to 44 in one short session - but then my son lost the bloody game. So I can't continue on the downward slope to my rightful brain age of 20.
I fear he may have dispensed with the game, because he was miffed it thought his brain was older than mine.

Sparx said...

Goodness me... and my little spud is so entranced by technology as well. Perhaps it is time to design a game where manners win points?

Emma said...

Have you noticed how the yoof of today have an answer for everything? Shame, its "whatever"!