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Thursday, 30 August 2007

Maternity ring

This morning my two darling munchkins started big school! Hurrah!!!

These holidays run on for far too long if you ask me. The poppets needed a break, but my word, did it have to go on for months on end? Half of Dulwich is back on Prozac.

By 8.30 A.M. the locality was at a complete standstill, there are nine independent schools within a one and a half mile radius of the cross roads, and so once again we had grid lock, what a relief! The schools threw open their doors and calm can return to SE21.

Both of my darlings were wearing a uniform for the first time. Max has now officially finished nursery and Freya has moved to a new all girls school around the corner. Max looked like a little version of his papa in his super tie and grey shorts. I was so proud, and really rather tearful.

Freya looked like a darling doll - her blonde curls cascading over her shoulders, her crisp tiny shirt and tie, one knee sock dangling at her ankle...

Everyone was kitted out in appropriate attire including new uncomfortable shoes, (mine really cut into me and I may just take them back to Emma Hope for a refund...) I had my diamonds specially cleaned at Tiffany in Sloane Square on Saturday and bought another new handbag for the occasion.

The school bullies were out in force, I shrieked with delight to see them - well one must really make the effort. I graciously declined coffee dans le village, immediately turned and fled out of the gates heading to the train station for fear I would hyperventilate with an anxiety attack.

I almost knocked sweet pregnant Imogen over as she was tearing out of Max's school from the other direction, and she immediately stopped and remarked on the blinding sparkles from my jewelery. "Oh they look really amazing today," she said, "I must insist that my husband buys me an eternity ring when our family is complete in a few months time. That is the form is it not? When our last child is born I am entitled to more diamonds - it is the law."

"Why indeed no," I replied in hushed tones, James was still close by positioning Freya with his long lens and camera next to a bicycle rack. "I acquired my eternity ring when I was pregnant with my first child, I told James it was a maternity ring, a reward for being pregnant."

She initially looked shocked, and then laughed and insisted that I am a very funny and quick witted person.

Oh how we laughed and laughed... before we both ran away from the schools as fast as our legs could carry us.

Actually I was being completely serious. I told James that men bought their wives maternity rings when they were pregnant with their first child...

Poor abandoned James texted me fifteen minutes later to say that Freya went into school with no objections at all! The school gates really are the most terrifying place...

18 comments:

IngeniousRose said...

Darling Dulwich Mum when I was at school the 'boy' bought the 'girl' an eternity ring way before the pregnacy stage had been reached, more as a symbol that 'the act' had occurred. Most shocking for me as a (now recovering) Catholic as you can imagine. Gosh if these girls got maternity rings as well they would need extra fingers. I am sounding frightfully snobby I realise. I wear my half ton of rings a heavy gold chain I wear round my neck. Tiffanys would probably bar me!

IngeniousRose said...

PS Do pass out a copy of Prozac nation to the people of Dulwich. That should do the trick!

dulwichmum said...

Perfect IngeniousRose,

I so know what you mean by an excess of jewels! I had the good fortune to be granted the opportunity to wear a ring left to my darling baby girl by a deceased paternal aunt earlier this year, and I swear Granzilla would have had an extra digit grafted onto her hand rather than to allow me to wear it myself!

IngeniousRose said...

The extra digit idea is actually a very good one DM, I may have to pursue it.

Zoal said...

I didnt know they allowed THOSE sorts of shoes at the new school?? well i certainly couldnt find the size 9 we were looking for in clarks even if little one says she rather likes "Emma's shoes"!!

The pressure has already started online ....cu at the gates (where i will be running from daily!)

dulwichmum said...

Lovely Zoal,

I may see you at the IoP, perhaps you could give me a lift - although it may be appropriate to call an ambulance to take me there...

lady macleod said...

having the goods tarted up eh? Always good to look your best at the start of term.

A maternity ring.. how the fellas at Tiffanys, Fred's, and Bvlgari's must love you darling.

DJ Kirkby said...

Maternity ring, brilliant! One diamond for each push?

dulwichmum said...

Sweet Lady M, I pride myself on the fact that the boys in Boodles know my name... (Sigh)

Darling DJ Kirkby, I hoped you would appreciate that phrase.

Frog in the Field said...

Gosh Dm, they've gone back early!
I've got lots of children here today yelling and running about trying to distract me from my blogging as much as they can. School runs fill me with dread, I just feel too tired, I will clean my diamonds today and then I'll feel better!

Omega Mum said...

Have I as usual got wrong end of stick or is your husband wearing divine grey shorts to work, too? If so, I just hope he has the knees for it. Or is that retro chic?

Clara said...

12 years of marriage, 3 children and no eternity ring never a mind a b****y maternity ring advice please DM

dulwichmum said...

Lovely Frog,

I always find that having my diamonds cleaned improves my self confidence no end!

Sweet Omega Mum,

I wondered when someone would notice that. James looked woeful in his grey shorts!

Perfect Clara,

OHMYGOD! I am afraid I would leave him alone with the children and come to stay with me until he changes his ways. How very dare he? Twenty four hours should do it.

If you ask me, all of this co-habiting has played havoc with a womans' God given right to jewelery!

debio said...

So pleased you are in the vanguard of yummy-mummy-dom!

I cried all the way home after dropping my little one at full-time school for the first time - not sure it was because I would miss her or because I was facing years of school-run-mums!

@themill said...

Don't you just mow each other down in your Dull Itch 4x4's? Give a whole new sense of adventure to the school run

Georgie said...

I agree on the maternity ring front - not that I'm a mummy yet but I've already dropped several hints about it being the norm! :)

Potty Mummy said...

Dear Dulwich Mum,
love the idea of a maternity ring but for those of who didn't manage that sneaky fast one (myself included, unfortunately) may I suggest the idea of maternity earrings? Always made it perfectly clear to my beloved that the pain of childbirth should be rewarded with diamonds for each ear - and when Boy #2 was born, I demanded an upgrade. It's almost - but not quite - enough of an incentive to go for #3... Amazingly most diamond retailers are more than happy to oblige if you ask them to double the size of the original earrings (for a small fee, obviously. But Husband dealt with that part...)

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