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Thursday 8 May 2008

On the face of things...

Everything has become far too superficial in my estimation. People are pre-occupied with appearance, which is after all so incredibly trivial…

In my opinion Gordon Ramsay stands out in this shallow society as an example to us all. Just look at him (if you can bear it), he is a successful, proud (some would say arrogant) man, and yet, he has a face so furrowed it resembles a Victoria sponge cake that someone slammed the oven door on when it was still rising...

Has he let his extreme unattractiveness hold him back in life? No, of course not. His self esteem is high, his belief in his own abilities and qualities are obvious. He has an uncrushable spirit. My housekeeper has blanched prettier celeriac than he.

Kylie Minogue is another such icon. She struts about on stage, her fringe scrapped back off her face, evidence of her mis-adventure with Botox clear for all the world to observe. Her comedy eyebrow is ascending so far up her fore head that the poor girl looks permanently surprised!

Whenever I consider popping along to Harley Street, I simply think of Kylie and Gordon and all calm is restored. I choose to remain au natural. I shall learn to love myself as I am. I am truly low maintenance. Why I haven’t yet endured that colonic irrigation treatment that I was agonising about...

NO!

I have my monthly trim and high lights, manicure, pedicure, bikini wax, threading, my eyebrows and lashes dyed, lash extensions, microdermabrasion, coconut scrub and spray tan. I really am a simple girl at heart (sigh)...

Don't you think that some people are simply addicted to treatments? They really don't know where to stop (gasp)!

7 comments:

Expat mum said...

Oh, never having taken Domestic Science, I always wondered why my cakes resembled Gordon's face. Better keep the door closed in future.

dulwichmum said...

Sweet Expatmum,

Indeed, now that I have shared my insights into home baking with you I feel like the Nigella Lawson of south east London!

Frog in the Field said...

My dear DM,
what a relief it is to know you don't overindulge in these ridiculous cosmetic and invasive procedures. Keeping to the bare minimum is obviously the way to go.
Frog
x

aims said...

Darling Dulwichmum - surely you jest! You of the perfect complexion and glowing skin - the tight abs and natural eyebrows....you surely don't need to waste any money on what us poor uglies have to dole out tons on!!

dulwichmum said...

Oh Frog darling,

I am so glad that you understand. You see, just like you I am naturally fabulous!

Sweet Aims,

I like to consider it to be a little light maintenance.

Jo Beaufoix said...

I always think au natural is the best way to go. I said it to Mr B just after I had my teeth whitened.

Georgina said...

At this time of year I'm looking forward to "Gods Free Highlights" and no need for fake tan, well just my lower legs where my wellies cover. Would I swap the mud and manure to be Kylie for a day? I think not. Debs x