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Saturday, 2 December 2006

The Dulwich Uniform

I am not very impressed. Either, I dress my baby girl in the manner of;

(a) Vicky Pollard, - baby pink lurex one armed belly top with a playboy bunny on the front and white leggings (à la Adams, Ladybird at Woolworths, Tesco, Asda, Next, The Gap, H&M and Top Shop)

(b) a 1940's evacuee in floral print dresses complete with mandarin collar and smocked yolk, mock hand knits, black patent leather shoes and white knee socks (à la Trotters, Peter Jones and Biff), or she wears -

(c) 'Boden'. We love Boden, it is practical, infinitely washable, hardwearing and she is comfortable and dressed like a three and a half year old child.

However, lose sight of her for 5 seconds by the swings in Dulwich Park on a Sunday morning, and you will find her indistinguishable from every other girl under 5 years old in Dulwich. I counted three little girls wearing her pea green duffle coat with the pink lining by the swings this morning. This would not be such a big deal, if it was not for the fact that all of the other mummies and daddies buy their casual clothes from the same catalogue too. There were three of us wearing the same skirt in the coffee shop (one admittedly in a different colour).

Mummies of Dulwich are starting to look like 'clones' in the manner of the 'Stepford Wives'. I am delighted that I have finally gotten rid of my regulation vinyl wipe able Orla Kiely handbag, as I no longer need to carry drinks and baby wipes and the kitchen sink. Have you noticed that everyone now pushes a 'Bugaboo' with their first child, and a 'Phil and Teds' with their second? Every little boy in the park is either sporting a blue Micro Scooter or those wooden bicycles with no pedals. What is going on? Is this just the 'Dulwich Uniform'?

A friend recently had her niece to stay from Ireland and she asked 'Why are all of the parents in Dulwich so old?' as though we are in some weird cult! Thanks for that sweetie, we prefer to think of ourselves as 'mature'.

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