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Monday, 11 June 2007

Eco friendly

On Sunday afternoon, I took myself off to the local branch of Sainsbury's, in an effort to escape my idyllic utopian family life. Ana (our au pair) has taken to her new diet of pure carbohydrates and sugar with great enthusiasm, and has been lying face down in the fridge of late - her rapid weight gain has been a joy to behold. In an effort to encourage her expansion, I must ensure the freezer cabinet is stacked high with potato waffles, oven chips, pizza, breaded mushrooms and onion rings. James says Ana is costing us a fortune, but these 'little extras' add up to no more than the cost of our previous au pairs gym membership.

Ana’s weight gain and shiny new braces on her teeth, ensure that once more I am the attractive lady of the house! Hurrah!!!

Mirror, mirror on the wall...

Don’t you just love it when a plan comes together?

I took along my 'Super U' shopping bags, which I purchased en France last summer. Those French folk don't even stock disposable plastic shopping bags in their super markets! One is forced to buy their sturdy environmentally friendly shopping bags (great stacks of them) on every single trip - I kept forgetting to take them out of the blooming car boot each time I visited the supermarket and was forever having to buy new ones!

Anyhow, I have no appetite to visit France again. Their toilet paper is barbaric, and no better than baking parchment. If I wanted a paper cut, I would have become a secretary. I judge every country by the quality, comfort and luxury of their conveniences. France is best avoided as I cannot abide the hardship it entails.

On Sunday, as I stacked my environmentally friendly shopping bags high with purchases (bleach, drain unblocker, dishwasher tablets, dishwasher cleaning products, Ciff cream, Ciff Mousse, lime scale remover gel, washing powder tablets, lime scale remover tablets, air freshener, Fabreze, duvet thick toilet paper and kitchen roll etc) - I was secure in the knowledge that I am personally responsible for saving the lives several species of British wild life.

Oh the joys of environmental awareness. It is indeed a wonderful thought that I am playing my part in maintaining the planet we all know and love…

16 comments:

Drunk Mummy said...

Dear DM - you are indeed a saint, and a true eco-warrior.
Glad to hear that the 'How to Look Grim Naked' plan is working with Ana!

I Beatrice said...

Yes - and when you do take your re-useable bags back to Sainsbury's, you get in confrontation with the cashier over whether you've paid for the damned things or not! I was asked to show my receipt for the 75p bag I'd bought several weeks earlier!

When I was a child in NZ, mind, we used the cloth bags in which we'd bought our flour as 'bread bags' - and I can even remember a time when we left our own jugs out for the milkman!

Which must make me sound at least a hundred - though things moved more slowly in NZ, so it's not quite as bad as you think.

I daresay the planet was safer in those days though...

dulwichmum said...

Darling Drunk Mummy,

I so love to look saintly with my re-usable shopping bags, but my whites must be white - if you see what I mean.

Lovely i beatrice,

OHMYGOD! I never imagined the staff could accuse us of shoplifting their ugly bags! Ha, ha, ha.

rilly super said...

well, now I think we know what happened to Swampy from the Dongas tribe when he came down from that tree in hampshire dear - 'fess up DM, we know who you really are now!

Nunhead Mum of One said...

Darling, you've always been green! And it's a colour that suits you so well! I long for the day that Starbucks reopens, it's getting quite tedious now!

I Beatrice said...

No,Rilly .. Swampy was in tree near me lately, and it definitely wasn't our dear DM!

Omega Mum said...

Call me stupid (ideally not to my face) but why escape from your idyllic lifestyle? I'm still trying to escape into one......Let me know if you have any going spare.

rilly super said...

PS, still time for TWO more votes in the blogpower awards, one today and one tomorrow..

Pig in the Kitchen said...

Could Ana be pregnant?

dulwichmum said...

Oh Rilly, how could you suggest such a thing? My white jeans would be torn to shreads if I so much as went near a tree!

Dear Nunheadmumofone,

Apparently by the end of the month, we shall be back in action at Starbucks, re-opened in our local Sainsbury's only bigger and better!

Darling i Beatrice, Thank you kindly for pointing this out.

OK Omega mum my lovely, I don't like to admit it too often - but the munckins were swinging from the light fittings and I was about to hit the gin...

Lovely Rilly,

It is done, and I will again tomorrow - naturally!

Lovely PITK,

OHMYGOD!!! HOW COULD I BE SO BLIND?

Stay at home dad said...

If only there were more people like you, Dulwich Mum. Not too, many though.

PS Am I allowed to snigger about I, Beatrice leaving her jugs out for the milkman?

mutterings and meanderings said...

Ah, I can just see you in Birkenstocks and dreadlocks ...

dulwichmum said...

Lovel Stay at home dad,

Thank you dear heart - I love it when men are nice to me ... prrr. Please don't laugh at my friend's jugs!

Dear M&M,

I posted your tea first thing today! I shall never wear Birkies until the offer kitten heels - and even then. As for dreadlocks? Eugh!

debio said...

Dear dulwich mum, I have found a soul-mate; as all the mega supermarkets here are French I spend many hours of the week scurrying around in search of soft, kind loo paper - you know, the type with the labrador puppy on the packaging?
French supermarkets are truly a reflection of the country.

beta mum said...

Take a tip from me, DM, take your own loo roll and plastic carrier bags with you to France.
They don't know what makes life worth living - all those long lunches. What's the point of that if you have to wipe your bum with pseudo-Izal?

dulwichmum said...

OHMYGOD! Girls - or should I just call you "Sisters" - thank God we have met. At last someone understands.

French public toilets seem to sport flies like some kind of badge of honour. Let us go now and rescue poor darling Pig in the kitchen and her family. I am sure we have enough room in the grounds of my capacious Dulwich mansion to erect her a super London base!

What do you think PITK? Shall we come and rescue you? Or will we just bring you supplies of Andrex?