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Sunday, 24 June 2007

Winners

Yesterday was a truly eventful day. It seemed so overcast in the morning, the nursery school sports day could so easily have descended into a Cath Kidston meets Glastonbury style mud bath, but no, the rain stayed away and all went well.

Perfect Max and darling Freya did their very best. I won the mothers race (again) in a super Joseph cashmere tracksuit, hurrah (well I really am terribly fit you know)... and James looked like a complete plum in the fathers race. Why do the men take it so very seriously? They thundered past - all clenched fists, beer guts and big red faces expelling aggressive Haka type howls as they charged.

One father who is a well known floppy haired actor, appeared to have been specifically 'styled' for the event. He spent most of the morning straining his head to see if "the paps" were about and seemed rather crest fallen that they were not. Clearly he was not aware of the fact that the editor of one of the most notorious Sunday rags was actually standing next to him for most of the morning with a Canon EOS 1DS camera with an L class Lens. Other city boy type daddies had obviously not exercised at all since university, and really should have purchased new shorts for the event... oh dear!

The children invited several chums along to watch James and I air lifted to Ascot. Trotting up Park Hall Road in my super chapeau with my dashing man to liaise with our transport - you will never guess who we met!

You really couldn't make this up... My big boss was driving past "the local comprehensive school you pay for" with his family in a battered old Mercedes Estate (the most practical car I think with young children). He tooted his horn and pulled over sharply but James and I simply couldn't stop. I made an effort to greet them but James had my arm and pulled me through the side gate of the College where we were promptly waved off on our helicopter journey by a dozen small boys and their parents. It really was a sickeningly cool spectacle! Yes my hair almost disintegrated with the breeze, and yes BB probably saw my lace underwear again, but these knickers were simply perfect!

We arrived by 12.15, in time to enjoy lunch. I had a bad head this morning when I awoke in James' capacious suite at The Wyndham Conrad Hotel in Chelsea Harbour, directly opposite Robbie Williams' penthouse apartment. I used my binoculars to look at his home - he has a telescope looking in exactly this direction! I imagine that in order to see Robbie right now you need to be in rehab too! Please excuse me, I must go and lie down with the windows open on my lovely Frette clad bed...

It is impossible to buy cheek bones like mine, and it is after all one of the laws of nature - survival of the fittest! Yesterday I was truly an Alpha mum, not Beta mum!

20 comments:

AntiScam said...

My word, what a day.

MJ said...

"Clearly he was not aware of the fact that the editor of one of the most notorious Sunday rags was actually standing next to him for most of the morning with a Canon EOS 1DS camera with an L class Lens."

funny

IngeniousRose said...

Fantastic! And bumping into your Big Boss as well. Could not be better. Shame Robbie wasn't in.

IngeniousRose!

I Beatrice said...

Great post DM (and thank you for visiting me - albeit on an old post that doesn't often see the light of day!).

You must watch that image of yours though! 'They' do say now that Ascot has become alarmingly Chavified - and that when Charles takes over from Mummy, the royal presence is likely to be dropped altogether...

Posh digs at Glastonbury are the in-thing at present (or so Ella Windsor and Peaches Geldof stoutly maintain). For those not fortunate enough to have tickets for Glyndebourne, that is.....

And PS. I didn't know the floppy-haired one had a school-age kid - or any kid, come to that!

Is there a secret here that haven't heard?

debio said...

Oh, dulwich mum, you are so 'dans le vent'. (Had a feeling the hairdo might be trashed but I bet the chapeau made up for it!)

The Good Woman said...

Gosh. All sounds like something out of a movie - starring a floppy haired actor nonetheless...

Frog in the Field said...

Dearest DM,
So please to hear you're back on form, only right you should be spectacularly induldged after such a rotten time and emotional upheaval!
It sounds really fab, floppy haired actor...hmm, you've got me wondering who that is, clues please!

Nunhead Mum of One said...

Darling, the wind from your helicopter caused David's cricket match to be abandoned.....

Drunk Mummy said...

Dear Dulwich Mum - so glad to hear your day went well. We all like to have a bit of fun with a big chopper now and again.

dulwichmum said...

Oh Antiscam,

Indeed, what a day...

Dear MJ,

That part was a complete hoot!

Lovely Ingenius Rose,

I know! If I had known that James had a suite just accross the harbour, I would have camped out there all week.

Sweet I Beatrice,

I would never venture out with the chavs, believe me, one cannot simply buy a ticket to join the company I enjoy at the races. Glastonbury will never be me, and Hugh Grant is not the only floppy haired man in London you know!

Perfect Debio,

Thank the Lord for Ellnet hairspray.

Frog in the field Sweetie,

You are not wrong, I felt like a Bond girl!

Super Nunhead mum of one,

Please pass on my apologies...

Drunk Mummy!!! OHMYGOD, how outragous! You are a scream.

lady macleod said...

My dear, dear DM

Well of course you won the race! duh.
You know, Q has given me the title of 'Queen Brand Name Whore', but I feel compelled, with no small amount of regret, to pass the title to you. Indeed, I would never have been able to work the camera in there (sigh).
Well done my lovely. Careful, careful on those 900 count sheets, don't cut a cheekbone..

DJ Kirkby said...

Hmmmmm...I am quite partial to riding my Chopper too. DM, you WORK?! Surely not...

Marianne said...

You do have all the fun DM, and another knicker opportunity! Lucky you.

Nunhead Mum of One said...

no apologies needed darling, David says they were losing so you actually did them a favour. He wants to know if you can repeat the whole thing next week somewhere deep in the heart of Surrey?

dulwichmum said...

Dear Lady MacLeod,

I so love fine bed linnen. Thank you for the title... I think?

Lovely Marianne,

I know, what am I like?

Sweet Nunhead Mum of One,

If but I had the chance to repeat an exit like that every weekend!

Omega Mum said...

I bow down before you (avoids decapitation from chopper blades, too).

antarctichousehusband said...

Dearest DM, it's all so Dynasty, I could die! But do you know they have a helipad at Glastonbury - you could have been in and out with ne'er a drop of mud on your Jimmy Choo's, had you so chosen. xx

Elsie Button said...

DM, i am intimidated by your poshness. is it jonathan ross? if so, my little brother goes to the same school...

Motheratlarge said...

Dear DM, feel like we are not worthy! Can only watch and admire as you show the rest of us how it's meant to be done.

dulwichmum said...

Please lovely Omega Mum,

No bowing down, I hardly ever get to be 'Alpha' - and when I do, I do it for us!

Darling Antarctichousehusband,

I know, and I am Alexis Carrington-Colby-Dexter! Glastonbury however will never be for me.

Sweet Elsie,

I am just a hanger on, if it was not for the corporate opportunities afforded to me by my husband - I would be nothing! I can't name the names or I will be cast out by the school gate mafia!

Dear Mother at Large,

Do you see now why I cannot allow my man to retire early? The only glamour in my life is afforded to me via his job!